orgogp.info

If you’re a single adult in the dating world, chances are that you have a dating past. Regardless of how plain or colorful your dating history is, disclosing it to your current lover can be a sensitive issue. Here are some simple tips and guidelines to make the process easier.

Tip #1 – Timing is Everything

When it comes to disclosing your past to your current lover timing can play a very large role. At MatchEdge, one of the most popular online dating sites, they’ve found that certain things are more import to disclose sooner than others.

For example, if you’re divorced or separated that’s something you want to bring up early on. It doesn’t have to be the first date, but a good rule of thumb would be to disclose that sort of information by the third date.

On the other hand, if you’ve never been married but have had several sexual partners, that’s probably something you want to discuss only after you get to know your lover a little better. As they say, “It’s not usually appropriate first date conversation.”

Tip #2 – The Devil is in the Details

Once you have decided that you are ready to disclose your past to your present lover, it’s probably a good idea to spear him/her the details. Usually people don’t really care to hear a detailed explanation of your sexual escapades. A good rule of thumb is to skip all the details unless if you are specifically asked for them.

Tip #3 – A Sensitive Issue

Chances are that if you’re nervous about disclosing your sexual past to your current lover, they are just as anxious to hear about it. It’s important to remember that your current lover may experience feelings of insecurity or jealousy. To help ease your current lover through this, try not to show too much emotion during the discussion. You should probably steer clear of discussing how you felt. Instead, try simply stating what you’ve done.

Tip #4 – Don’t Fall for Traps

If you’re having these types of discussions with your current lover, you should know if they are the jealous type or not. To ward off the green eyed monster, you may want to tread carefully. Once you are done disclosing the information, you want to steer clear of what I call traps. Traps are questions that are innocently disguised but may lead to hurt, anger or jealousy on your partners end. You’ll recognize these traps because the questions will usually be about feelings or thoughts and they will be linked to a person. For example, “Have you done xyz” is a very different question from, “Do you still think about xyz with so-and-so?”

Tip #5 -Reap the Rewards

If you are serious about your current lover, sharing this information will allow them to know you better, while giving you and your lover a stronger bond. At MatchEdge, they’ve found that the relationships that have less secrets between them tend to be stronger than those who keep secrets.

Remember, no one can ever fault you for being honest with them. Regardless of what your sexual past holds, it’s a part of who you are. If your current lover is a keeper, they will be glad that you had enough faith and confidence in them to share such an intimate part of yourself. Good luck and happy sharing!

Visual aids and props can go a long way in lending interest and depth to your presentation. Many people are highly visual in nature. “Did you see that!” Audiences tend to remember visually presented information more clearly and in more detail. If you’re still a bit nervous, a small “prop” will help you to keep your hands “busy”, so you can avoid a number of unconscious “nervous habits”. Some props and visual aids I’ve found useful during my presentations include these items.

Small stuffed animals

I’ve used “Winnie the Pooh”, “Tigger” and “Piglet” on more occasions than I can count. I also have successfully used “generic” stuffed rabbits, frogs, puppies and mice. Be creative and imaginative in coming up with ways to use them to help make your point and your audiences will eat it up.

Hand outs

Hand outs are still an effective means of keeping your audience in tow. Use them to reinforce your main points, as an outline for your audience to follow your presentation and as additional information they can take away. If you have additional services or a product to offer, be sure to include a flyer as part of your handout package. I’ve actually had seminar attendees almost literally fight over handouts, climbing over one another in their quest to get the handout package.

Photographs

Photographs make great visual aids – When I recently gave presentations to group of fellow teachers, I included slides which not only quoted some of them but used a photo of them as well. In another presentation, I used a collage of photos to illustrate the upcoming themes and topics of my presentation. One of my most memorable “Thank You for attending” slides featured a collage of photos I’d taken previously of persons who were in the audience. Needless to say, it went over quite well.

Charts and graphs

Charts and graphs put verbal information into a visual form that is much more easily digested and remembered by audiences. They can also add a more colorful dimension to your presentation statistics and key facts.

Demonstrations

By all means don’t miss an opportunity to include a short demonstration in your presentation. Use volunteers from the audience, mini-competitions, etc. to deeply involve attendees of your presentation. It’ll be all the more memorable not only for them, but for their fellow attendees as well. Have them give a brief comment, relate an experience or offer up a relevant anecdote during your presentation. Ask for volunteers, “Has anyone had an experience with …” or “Has this ever happened to anyone here?” I always get at least a couple of eager volunteers. They sure can liven things up.

Video

Video is a marvelous tool that is being included more and more into all kinds of presentations. Digital video clips needn’t be lengthy or excessively large and can be inserted into a Power Point slide. These include full color, motion and sound to introduce, illustrate or deepen a key point. Their use should be controlled if not limited as they can cause “technical problems” if the equipment you’re using isn’t yours. A differently configured computer can wreak havoc on your carefully crafted presentation.

Don’t leave out sound

Don’t leave out sound in your presentations either. Some ideas include using a bell, whistle, rattle, Kazoo, slide whistle, flute, rhythm sticks or some other little noise maker. Leave the Klaxon horns and foghorns for New Year’s Eve. Sound can be used as prompts for attention-getting, cueing slides or activities or audience participation – “Now at the sound of the bell, everybody say …

Use more audio visual aids and props in your presentations. You too will then have more attendees approaching after your presentation to shake your hand and say, “Thanks, I really enjoyed your presentation.”